For all ye math-inclined ;)

Love math

Smart man + smart woman =love
Smart man + stupid woman = affair
Stupid man + smart woman = marriage
Stupid man + stupid woman = pregnancy

Office math

Smart boss + smart employee = profit
Smart boss + stupid employee = productivity
Stupid boss + smart employee = promotion
Stupid boss+stupid employee = overtime

Shopping math

If anything is half price, woman buys it anyways.
A man buys it for double the price, if he needs it

General connections and statistics

A woman worries about her future until she gets married.
A man is not worried about his future until he gets married.

A man is successful when his earnings are higher than his wife’s spending.
A woman is successful if she finds such a man.
If you want to be happy with a man you have to understand him and love him a bit.
If you want to be happy with a woman, you have to love her a lot and do not try to understand her.

A married man lives longer but wishes more his own death.
A married man forgets about his own faults; it’s useless for two people to remember the same thing.

A man wakes up with the same looks.
A woman’s look deteriorates during the night.

A woman before getting married hopes her man will change, but she is wrong.
A man before getting married hopes his wife will not change, but he is wrong.

In every argument the woman has the last word.
If a man utters anything after, a new argument starts.

Ain't that a bitch...

Everybody put some fuckin' warm clothes on tomorrow...