Nice

Oct. 11th, 2008 08:01 pm
cryowizard: (Default)
Liquid is the new black.

              -- Connie
cryowizard: (Default)
DM: ...and in the immortal words of Kermit the Frog, "It ain't easy being green..."

Connie: Dude, he's a puppet with a hand up his ass. If you had a hand up your ass, it wouldn't be easy being you either...

{hysteria and curtain}

Wet dream

Jan. 12th, 2007 10:21 am
cryowizard: (Default)
Brazilian woman that used to work with Connie, talking to her boss (every day):

- Charles, I have a lottery ticket in my hand here. When it wins, I will jump on your desk and piss on it.
cryowizard: (Default)
Connie's dad is a lawyer.

Connie is 4 years old when her parents overhear her telling another girl that

"...girls have vaginas and boys have subpoenases..."
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Connie is 16.

She comes home, wearing her Catholic School uniform, to find out that her mother found her weed stash and flushed it down the toilet.

- Daaad! Mom trashed my weed!!! Can we please go out for ice cream???!

- Okay...
cryowizard: (Default)
Connie is 6.

- Mom, can I get a telephone in my room?

- When shit turns to apple butter!

- What's apple butter?
cryowizard: (Default)
- Hey Connie, what did your mother used to call you when you were little?

- One was "Goddamit Connie" and the other - "Connie Goddamit".

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